Using Favors To Your Advantage
Using Favors To Your Advantage
By Matthew Shack
I don't like owing people favors.
I am a control freak.
I like to remain autonomous and stay in charge.
But, I’ve personally given out many favors over the years to friends, family and to those who are in need.
I have no problem with helping out whom I love and have earned my trust, but that's where the saga continues.
Trustworthy folks aren’t the ones usually asking for the favors.
More often than not, it's those selfish individuals who either have no business asking for a favor in the first place, or those who wouldn't offer your boy a piece of bubblegum when they have an entire pack in their pocket.
Ask Don Corelone.
Some day, and that day may never come, I'll call upon you to do a service for me. But until that day -- accept this justice as a gift on my daughter's wedding day.
- Vito Corleone, The Godfather Part I
Some people just like to do favors with no strings attached and without thinking that people have a sense of owing them something in return.
I feel the same way nearly 100% of the time. Why? Because, I never have to call in any of those favors. Righteous people will always get you back without you calling in a marker.
When a real ‘G’ owes you something, they usually try to pay you back with smaller favors or get you back on the huge tip.
But, when it comes down to those who are always asking for favors yet not returning them, a brilliant historian from Philly back in the 18th century said it best.
"Most people return small favors, acknowledge medium ones and repay greater ones - with ingratitude." - Benjamin Franklin
I am neither fan nor foe of those who are ungrateful with my favoritism.
I’m not mad at you; I’m just not f*****g with you.
I use to have a supervisor who always began our conversations with, “Do me a favor?” Being his employee, I would always comply.
Favors from me would always include doing things that over stepped my job scope on his behalf.
Work related tasks that he was supposed to do, and mundane things he was being well-paid to complete on his own.
The more he asked for favors, the more I complied because I was a good employee.
I thought I was tallying up goodwill and putting myself in prime position to move-up in the company and receive the raise he cheerfully promised me months before.
I later found out the hard way when after more than a year of tallying up favors from him, I asked if I could leave 10 minutes early to go to a doctor’s appointment that I notified him of earlier in the week.
Not only did he say, “No” to my request, he also suggested that I should've have been more considerate and rescheduled my appointment for the weekend since I would now be unable to grant him the favor he was preparing to ask of me.
Did I stay and grant him another favor? Hell no!
I called the BIG boss and asked HIM for a damn favor…it was granted and I left.
Needless to say, my supervisor and I were at each other’s throats until the day I resigned. I did no more for favors for that rat bastard and told him so to his face! (I also didn’t get my raise for obvious reasons.)
Grant favors freely if it is within your means, but don’t pass out multiple favors to deadbeats.
If you don’t hear some form of the following responses after granting a person a favor, you most likely will not be getting that favor in return:
“Thank you! I really appreciate it.”
“I owe you a big favor: if there's ever anything I can do for you in return, please do just ask.”
“I got you homie, don’t even trip.”
“How can I ever repay you?”
“Have it back to you in a few days, fam.”
“What would you like me to do to make it up for you?” (This is for the ladies)
As a hustler, make sure to rack-up lots of favors that you never cash in.
This might seem contradictory to my previous viewpoint but it is in fact, solid game.
Some of the best come-ups I’ve ever had were from lacing favors to specific people who couldn’t hook me up when I shot them a solid.
Even if they don’t get you back; they still know they owe you. Donating your favor builds rapport and increases your reputation as a go-to-guy.
Once seen as that, you will reap the benefits of that shine, even if you aren’t keeping score. Your rep is now the scoreboard and you have a commanding lead.
When calling-in a favor, timing is everything, and ask for them only when necessary or you'll burn up all your favors like a rookie NFL coach tossing a challenge flag.
Be very selective when asking for favors. This is a cautionary tale.
You don’t ask Deebo for a favor… ever! Or a crackhead… or more importantly, any person who doesn’t truly appreciate your charitable nature.
Keep it hustle!